I Married a Martian

While browsing my blog, I realized I've not posted a short story in over a year. I figured it was time to correct that.

The following ~450 word short was hastily written in response to a writing group challenge. The challenge's prompt was "I married a Martian." It's the first light-hearted thing I've written in a good while. I hope you enjoy!

I Married a Martian

by Jeff Hargett

Yes, I broke the interspecies marriage law, but how was I to know Cosp wanted to destroy Earth? I mean, he's a Martian. Why should he care?

Zelda told me I was asking for trouble. "All Martians want to destroy Earth," she said. Orson Wells tried to tell us, but nobody listened. Well, Chuck Jones listened and created Marvin, so maybe it had to do with Bugs getting the better of him on Saturday mornings.

It was a vortex relationship. I spotted him while on vacation. He was taking the same lunar orbit holiday cruise I was. I had to settle for the $999,999.99 cheap seats, but there he was three rows ahead of me on the left. I'm a sucker for silver hair and Cosp's hung past his shoulders. It highlighted that ever-so-sexy blue-tinted skin of his. That Martian smote me before he saw me. Three days and 250,000 miles later we were hunting for preachers.

Marrying a Martian ain't easy. The first thing you got to do is get to Iceland. It's the only place on Earth so far that's repealed that blasted law. And if that wasn't enough, finding somebody willing to join baby-face blue and auburn-topped ivory in holy matrimony is about as easy as eating triple-scoop butter pecan in the Mojave before it melts. And then they charge you extra.

We honeymooned there. Seven days and six nights with excursions to Greenland wasn't my idea. Cosp said it reminded him of home. Too much heat and his complexion turns all aqua, he said. I bought it. How was I to know the central complex for the planetary defense shield rested square in the middle of Greenland?

Our marriage was about as brief as our courtship was. There I was basking in Greenland's balmy twelve degree sunshine and every alarm on the planet goes crazy. Cosp said he was going to the lavatory. Didn't dawn on me until later that Martians void by sweating. It ain't as bad as it sounds though. It's odorless.

I never realized how fast those F-63s fly nowadays. Those older model jets never stood a chance at taking out ICBMs, but they apparently train those pilots well. They intercepted every nuke Cosp managed to launch.

I never saw my husband again. I guess they got him. It ain't like Martians can turn invisible or beam back to Mars. They never came after me though. Cosp must have kept us a secret. Say what you will, but that hunk of sexy alien had a soft spot for me in both of those blue hearts of his, ulterior motive or not.

Yes, I married a Martian, but blast my asteroids, I'd do it again.

Miscellaneous News

Nutschell from over at The Writing Nut is featuring my Writing Workspace today so stop by and say hi. Every Wednesday, a writer permits the blogosphere a peek into his or her creative sanctuary. Nutschell makes that peek possible. (Of note: this interview was the last post I drafted before I lost Myra.)

My latest short story (The Orchid) will make its appearance later this week in April Grey's Hell's Garden collection of short stories.

Stories include:

• Round and Round the Garden by Jonathan Broughton
• Ten Minutes Till Deadtime by Mark Cassell
• When the Devil Came to Hell's Kitchen by Heather Holland Wheaton
• The Orchid by yours truly (Amazon)
• Compost by Eric Dimbleby
• Gunda's Gnomes by Rayne Hall

If you're into darker tales, you'll be pleased with this collection. Some fine writers have contributed to this effort. It's always an ego boost to have a story appear alongside those of top-notch writers.

About the editor: April Grey

April Grey's urban fantasy novel, Chasing The Trickster, is published by Eternal Press. Her short stories have been published in such print anthologies as Demonmind's Halloween 2010, The Best of Everyday Fiction 2, Northern Haunts, Ephemera and Terrible Beauty, Fearful Symmetry. Many of these stories can be found in her collection, The Fairy Cake Bake Shoppe available through Amazon and Smashwords.

She and her family live in Hell's Kitchen, NYC in a building next to a bedeviled garden. Gremlins, sprites or pixies, something mischievous, lurks therein. Someday she'll find out.

www.aprilgrey.blogspot.com and www.aprilgreywrites.com.

In other news, my oldest grandson will be turning eight next month and my middle grandson just turned six last month. Despite my best efforts to stop them they keep growing up and making me older.

Over the past six or so weeks, my job has kept me busier than the Affordable Health Care website developers. The sad part is that statement really isn't much of an exaggeration. The good part is that being so busy lately has helped a bit in my bereavement struggle, but the steps forward are still agonizingly small. Today makes twenty-five weeks.

I think I've finally come to a decision about The Bonding. I believe I'll take the self-publishing route for the Strands of Pattern series. I've been researching cover designers and have actually started contacting some. My compulsion to continually edit the thing prevents me from deciding on a release date, but I'm looking at maybe late 2014. We'll see. :-)

What Turning 50 Means to Me

Today, I'm turning fifty. The Big Five Oh! I always imagined it would be a momentous day, a milestone of sorts.

Turning twenty was such a milestone. It was then that I finally accepted that I was an adult. It wasn't all joyous. I joked that it was my mid-life crisis. I loved being a teenager in the prime of my life. Twenty didn't mean I had grown old, but it did mean I had grown older. My twenty-year-old brain figured old would come later, say, when I turned fifty.

Turning 50. Fire hazard?

In some respects, the fifty milestone is exactly what I expected. I'm grateful to be alive and acutely aware that a half-century of life lay behind, rather than in front, of me.

The fifty mile-marker comes with some costs. Things don't work as well now as they did years ago. Joints creak and pop. Muscles complain. The brain learns more slowly and forgets more frequently. Hair goes gray or goes away. And eyes refuse to focus on anything within two feet of them.

But the milestone also comes with some perks. My two children and three grandchildren are perks most priceless. I've accumulated fifty years worth of wisdom. I have a home and a good job with great coworkers.

I'm not old enough to have gone mountain climbing with Moses or talk about the weather with Noah, but I did see the end of the Vietnam War, the Berlin Wall come down, Challenger explode, Watergate unfold, President Reagan shot and all 444 days of the Iran hostage crisis. I saw the rise and fall of disco, CB radios, and Netscape Navigator. I witnessed the birth of Nasdaq, MTV, Microsoft, the first test-tube baby and a cloned sheep named Dolly. I saw pocket calculators, personal computers, cell phones and the internet itself invented--not all by Al Gore. :-)

I experienced the bliss of finding the perfect wife and the inconsolable anguish of losing her. Maybe that's what it took for me to finally accept that flesh and blood are not immortal.

Please be safe!

I've seen a lot, done a lot, survived a lot. I've achieved successes and learned from failures. Thanks to modern medicine, I've even defied death.

So, as expected, turning fifty is still a milestone. Yes, in some ways I really do feel old, but in other ways, not so much. I've learned to cherish not only each birthday, but every day. They're all gifts we're not guaranteed to receive.

Turning fifty means I'm alive. And come bliss or heartache, I'll accept that gift and keep living it as best I can.

Happy Birthday, Angel Baby

Myra,

As with the card celebrating what would have been our 29th anniversary, I give to you this one celebrating your birthday. And being the well-trained husband that I am, I'll not broadcast your age.

Whether it be by cosmic accident or divine grace, we found each other. From the moment we met, a beautiful friendship evolved. And from that friendship came even more.

2013-12-13 Birthday Card Cover

Within months, I had no dream, no goal that didn't include you. We committed ourselves to each other completely, till death do us part. We became one, two halves of a whole, a partnership in every sense of the word.

2013-12-13 Birthday Card Inside

I then experienced for almost twenty-nine years the bliss of loving the perfect-for-me wife. We gave each other all we had and did so without reservation. We loved. We cherished. We thrived.

(Envelope)

Our reward came in the form of a wondrous marriage. We were as inseparable as wet and water. Only death had the power to sever our bond.

It's your birthday, Myra, but every birthday you had was a gift to me.

The Importance of Turkeys

Turkeys were prominent in my little bungalow Sunday. With it being the four-month marker of my wife's passing, I worried it might turn into one of those sad, weepy days. Fortunately, turkeys and family came to the rescue.

The need to concoct some kind of sweet dessert for work and flex my kitchen muscles a bit gave me a much needed diversion. I felt that making good use of Myra's kitchen was a fitting way to honor her memory.

Sweet birds created by a bird brain and his daughter

Grandchildren laughing and sneaking treats under the willfully blind eyes of Paw Paw makes Paw Paw's house a fun weekend excursion. Grandchildren with half a ton of sugar in their bellies are primed for the return trip home.

And if birds weren't enough, grandchildren cure most any sadness

The importance of turkeys becomes clear when family joins forces to face a fowl challenge undertaken by the half-senile widowed man. Time spent with family is time best spent.

All grandchildren should learn to make peace with turkeys

We all had fun. We baked and decorated and frosted happy turkeys. We had insufficient space to accommodate angry birds, electronic or otherwise. Frosting was the glue that held the birds together. Love is the glue that holds our family together.

The turkeys are packed and ready to brighten my coworkers' day too

So, what does a widower do when asked to bring snacks to work? He ponders the importance of turkeys and how they bring family together. Nothing else can turn a monthly mourning milestone into a thankful, happy affair.

For any who are interested, the ingredients for sweet turkeys are:

• Double-stuff Oreos. (Make sure they're double-stuff!)
• Candy corn
• Whoppers
• Mini-peanut butter cups
• Dark frosting (We used chocolate.)
• Icing for eyes and legs. (Yellow, white and black)
• Frosted brownies or cupcakes. (Oreos don't slide so much on frosting.)
• Reese's Pieces to decorate the brownies or cupcakes
• A lot of love and family for extra sweetness

In the event I don't post again until after Thanksgiving, please accept my wish of a happy holiday. May you find a multitude of reasons to be thankful. And don't forget the important role of turkeys.

Three Months Separated

I decided a momentary break from my blogging hiatus was due. I'm surfacing for a multitude of reasons, not the least of which is to convey gratitude to all who have been checking in on me from time to time. Your compassion and support have been incredibly welcome and helpful.

I also wanted to let you all know how I'm faring.

Three months ago, death separated me from my wife of twenty-nine years. For all twenty-nine of those years, I've loved her more than life itself. I've searched for reasons and meaning. I've clung to hopes and promises. I've remembered and I've cried. God, how I've cried.

Her wedding rings are never far from my heart

This tempest of emotions is neither brief nor tame. I'm but an island besieged by a hurricane, its fury unyielding. Moments of calm are only the storm's eye. I've wept in its wind and railed at its rain, but the tempest persists. It always will.

But I am weathering the storm!

It's grueling. It's painful. But I promised her I would live and love for us both. And I'm doing it. Thankfully, I'm not doing it alone. My mother, brother and children have given vital support. And those three precious grandsons of mine are three very important reasons to succeed.

I've chosen to share some very specific things that have helped me succeed so far:

• The bereavement counseling at Hospice. (Thanks for persuading me to give it a shot, guys!) There, I'm free to talk about Myra and my loss without burdening family and friends. And I've received some excellent suggestions and comfort.
• Wearing her rings around my neck. Having something of hers that's tangible somehow preserves the physical connection. I hold them, kiss them and tell her how much I love her.
• I remind myself--frequently--that Myra was God's before she was mine. She was God's gift to me, but only for a time. I choose to be grateful for that time.
• I write Myra a letter every single day just as if I were on a business trip. Captured within those letters are every significant thought, event and emotion I've experienced since her death. They express my anguish, my love, my despair, my hopes--everything. It's probably the single most therapeutic thing I do.

I've already filled up one 160-page journal, and am well into the last third of this 200-page journal. I have two more waiting.

I have no idea how long I'll continue writing her or how long I'll continue writing daily. I'm guessing that I'll never completely stop.

In the short term, I have a couple very difficult months ahead of me. We've always made big deals of Thanksgiving, Christmas and even the traditional New Year's Day dinner. However, December also holds her birthday, my birthday and a grandson's birthday. Those too were big deals in our family.

This week has been a good one. Last week was tumultuous and I wrestled with some serious anger. Bouts of depression arise--often without warning. Laughter can become tears in mere seconds and vice versa. It's all normal and part of the grieving process.

The important thing is that I am healing. It's an agonizingly slow process, but it is happening. In time, I'll return from my hiatus. I'll resume work on my writing, hop some blogs and again contribute what I can to this awesome community of writers and bloggers that I've come to call friends.

Taking the World by Storm

CassaStorm

By Alex J Cavanaugh

From the Amazon Best Selling Series!

A storm gathers across the galaxy…

Commanding the Cassan base on Tgren, Byron thought he’d put the days of battle behind him. As a galaxy-wide war encroaches upon the desert planet, Byron’s ideal life is threatened and he’s caught between the Tgrens and the Cassans.

After enemy ships attack the desert planet, Byron discovers another battle within his own family. The declaration of war between all ten races triggers nightmares in his son, threatening to destroy the boy’s mind.

Meanwhile the ancient alien ship is transmitting a code that might signal the end of all life in the galaxy. And the mysterious probe that almost destroyed Tgren twenty years ago could return. As his world begins to crumble, Byron suspects a connection. The storm is about to break, and Byron is caught in the middle…

“With a talent for worldbuilding and a compelling cast of characters, Alex J. Cavanaugh combines high powered space battles and the challenges of family dynamics to provide readers a space opera with heart.”
- Elizabeth S. Craig, author of the Southern Quilting and Myrtle Clover mysteries

“I thought the revelation was going to be one thing and I was completely wrong … CassaStorm pushes the limits…”
- Tyson Mauermann, Speculative Reviews

“…mesmerizing story of survival, personal sacrifice, tolerance, and compassion. It’s a rare jewel that successfully utilizes both character and plot to tell a story of such immense scope and intimate passion…” - Nancy S. Thompson, author of The Mistaken

$16.95 USA, 6x9 Trade paperback, 268 pages, Dancing Lemur Press, L.L.C.

Science fiction/adventure and science fiction/space opera

Print ISBN 9781939844002 eBook ISBN 9781939844019

$4.99 EBook available in all formats

Find CassaStorm:

Barnes and Noble - http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1116848619?ean=9781939844002

Amazon -

http://www.amazon.com/CassaStorm-Alex-J-Cavanaugh/dp/1939844002/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1378484337&sr=1-1&keywords=cassastorm

Amazon Kindle - http://www.amazon.com/CassaStorm-ebook/dp/B00F2O9QMC/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1378811366&sr=1-1&keywords=cassastorm

Goodreads - http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17670532-cassastorm

Book trailer - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Umm2l0XdHc&feature=youtu.be

Alex J. Cavanaugh has a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree and works in web design and graphics. He is experienced in technical editing and worked with an adult literacy program for several years. A fan of all things science fiction, his interests range from books and movies to music and games. Online he is the Ninja Captain and founder of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group. The author of the Amazon bestsellers, CassaStar and CassaFire, he lives in the Carolinas with his wife.

Website – http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.com/

Twitter – http://twitter.com/AlexJCavanaugh  

Goodreads - http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4287922.Alex_J_Cavanaugh