Don't believe me?
What happens when I sit next to a verb in some writer's manuscript? That's right, the same thing that happens when Cousin A. J. sits next to a noun. I get evicted, forcefully and gleefully. If the writer isn't striking me out then his editor is. A. J. says it ain't pretty at all when it happens to her. Well, I agree wholeheartedly.
I remember fondly the days when I was celebrated on television.
Why, I've seen some writers come up with entire sentences just to get rid of me.
A couple weeks back my former best friend, Willie Writer, used A. J. and me in the same sentence describing an awfully pretty necklace. Then somebody has to go and tell Willie that A. J. and I don't belong in that sentence. Out we went! Willie used seventeen words to replace us!
Discrimination, I say. Discrimination!
So you think you've got it bad, do you? Try being an adverb nestled neatly within the pages of a manuscript sitting on an editor's desk. Then we'll talk.
Excuse me, won't you? I'm writing a strongly worded letter to the editor.
Treat Cousin A. J. and me nicely, okay? And as always, write wisely!